Recognizing Emotional Verbal Abuse
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Verbal and emotional abuse is the same and they cause an equal damage to the victim like physical abuse. However, the difference is verbal abuse is tolerated for a longer time than physical abuse by individuals. Verbal abuse does not leave a mark on the body but it does affect the mind of a victim. The effects of verbal abuse are more difficult to recognize. People can tell from the symptoms of the relationship that it is abusive.
In such a relationship, the abuser will deny the partner from gaining access to money or even property. The victim is controlled by the abuser and also is dependant. Without transportation and financial means it is not easy for the victim to get away from the abuser.
Abusers often alienate the victim from friends, work and even family. For example a woman might abuse her partner on the name of jealousy that he is cheating with his friends or co workers and the man cuts of from his friends so that he can stop the arguments. Even parents can withdraw a child from the school if the councilor is suspecting abuse. Without a support system from the outside, it is impossible for the victim o break free. They increasingly become dependent on the abuser. Their every day life is controlled and even loved ones cannot recognize the symptoms because they are cut off.
The abuser damages the self esteem of his partner by constantly insulting and humiliating. The partners insult in front of others or parents might insult their children in front of others. Abusers also use guilt as another tactic. They often make the victim feel guilty and as if they owe something to the abuser. These can damage the self esteem and also confuse the victim’s sense of right and wrong. The victim is also led to believe that that the abuse was just for something that they did wrong.
The abusers threaten to physically harm themselves or the victim. The make the victim compliant to their demands using force or fear. For instance, a boyfriend might threaten his girlfriend that he will commit suicide if she leaves him. This kind of control problems can spiral into nasty verbal fights or may even escalate into a physical fight.
The fear that the victim feels in this type of relationship is quite high. Victims often feel trapped. The relationship is considered emotionally and verbally abusive when a child has to hide from his/her parents or when a wife feels frightening looking at the watching and thinking that it is time for her husband to come home.
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